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http://pm1.narvii.com/6319/3050883dc2514f1a689d1edaa1c2e8024a4e31d2_hq.jpg

O great and powerful mods, editors, and artists I beseech thee to use your dark magics on this most worthy image so it may one day meet the base requirements for this most... erm.. energetic ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) corner of the internet. It may be a safe image but I assure you it's potency mustn't be underestimated.

https://i.warosu.org/data/jp/img/0138/54/1438468682116.jpg
Or perhaps this not so safe image would make a better offering?

Though your abilities may not work like that, do not flog this simple peasant.