feminism is equality. feminism fights against gender roles, including the male ones. ofc, feminism is a huge movement made by the people who are inside it, so its not homogeneous. however the main premises of it are of equality. there are some girls who have been raped and suffered a lot because of the patriarchy that answer verbally on a hateful way, but they dont do any real harm to men. they just complain and accuse, but for real they just want to live their lives in peace, without fear of something horrible happening again. a little empathy and understanding that, despite also having to fit a conformity, males are in a position of privilege, is never too much.

You don't create equality with a one sided movement. You create a lop sided view of your version of equality. The black movement for equality for example, there were pretty much two 'factions' within the entirety. You had people that demonstrated like Martin Luther King Jr. They were civil, they worked with official mediums, they cooperated and garnered help from the 'white' side too. Then you had the black panther, this is what your like minded are at. Its forceful, no cooperation, one sided, 'my side or get lost' kind of thing.

While you may not be it, this nonsense has seen enough harass others in order to get their way. A mod friend for example has been doxed (reveal personal information online). He had calls of threat, and packages of questionable content that end up resorting to calling the authorities and being placed in protective custody. He had to move out of his house to a hotel and cut off all internet communication. This was for a few months. The cause of this was because he was discussing 'gamergate' things. While he was on the 'pro' gg side, he was civil, he never insulted anyone, but what he gets is a face full of radicals ruining his life for a while. What came of it? Well, more people hate the social justice side.

Honestly, you're finding a victim in which no victim is had. There are woman that work in 'high power position'. There are men that work in 'lowly position'. This patriarchy does not exist anymore. This is something fabricated for the sake of finding something to blame. If anything that is 'ruling' its the high class rich people that control companies and politicians.

i dont understand where did i talked about shielding others from reality?
i talked about the opposite, the excessive idealization that distorts peoples standards and perceptions of reality.

That is shielding people from reality. The one you mention in specific like body type is fine. No it isn't, being obese is bad, being anorexic is bad. These are objective facts that are detrimental to your health. It doesn't mean we should be making fun of them, we should be helping them, encouraging them. If it's a friend accompany them to gym or help plan their food.
Stuff like fat acceptance is wrong. You don't accept bad attributes that are objectively bad for you.
There are subjective stuff, looks, preferences, etc, things that people will or will not like. Then there are objective stuff, health, mental well being, education, etc.
Reality is there are rapists, there are murderers, there a pedophiles, this is reality. You can't fix something that is either their compulsion, mental issue, or just plain nuts. You help others by making them aware that these are issues, how to protect themselves, not try to make it go away because it never will.

Some people will never change, reality is that. You live with it, make an example of yourself. You don't need to try and change people. You change yourself, you make better of yourself. That, while passive, garners more support than this shit. You have stories way back in the day during the separate but equal period. There were people that just work along side with each other just because they learned that people are human. They are like them. That one american foot ball movie, Remember the Titans, based off historical events. They found out that hey, these guys are awesome! Why did we even hate them, we work together and accomplish amazing things. What we have here is "hey, this side is evil! (patriarchy), fuck them!". While obviously exaggerated a bit, that is what it looks like.

oh, i wasnt aware you mod a forum, cool! hahaha, those peoples hearts burn passionately when the matters are inequality, for some reason~
im sad you think that social justice are these bad things. indeed, trying to build something just to be constantly smashed by no constructive reason isnt very encouraging. i hope i have answered well enough! feel free to point something out or anything, okay?

Some are blind hatred, but most reasoning is, you are doing it wrong. They understand that no one is the same. There are some things that each gender can do, some things they can't do. This is reality.
There was a woman (forgot the name =/) that is/was a very famous feminist that modern 'feminist' hate. She was like minded of what is considered first/second generation feminist. They look for equality in the right things. Politics, work place, stuff like that. They know that they're still female. They know they can do some things that males can't and vice versa. They know that they're all different.